Twitter is easily one of the best inventions of all-time. The microblogging site can be a treasure chest of hilarity, or a massive pain in the ass. For people with anxiety disorders, Twitter is a nightmare because we constantly feel like we’re missing something or not doing something right. It’s never-ending. And then when people don’t respond to your perfectly-crafted tweets, your therapist visits increase. Whatever Twitter means to you, it is still a great source of comic relief on-demand. Here are my 10 favorite tweets, in no particular order:
The following two are combined. Oh, the joys of fantastically-devised hashtags:
#WhatToSayAfterSex I have sparkly uggs do you want to see them
— aye (@halluzaynating) February 1, 2013
#whattosayaftersex i have aids
— p (@SugaDaddyStyles) February 1, 2013
Ravens? 49ers? Who?
Bravo poll confirms that Beyonce will win the Super Bowl http://t.co/eCGr2i0S
— darren rovell (@darrenrovell) February 2, 2013
Be on your best behavior:
Going to see Django Unchained again, but this time with my white friends. They better not laugh.
— Official Wanda Sykes (@iamwandasykes) February 24, 2013
Something we can all relate to:
We all have that one sad friend who tries too hard and it just isn't working for her
— Marina Girl (@MarinaGirlSays) May 7, 2013
Even Apple bows down to Bey:
"To infinity and Beyonce" the greatest autocorrect error of all time
— Ariana Grande (@ArianaGrande) May 8, 2013
When dumb people try to be smart, it’s funny:
North Korea launched three missiles into the sea today because they got a bone to pick with Poseidon. http://t.co/TYUqfsLhNS
— Gawker (@Gawker) May 18, 2013
Run, bitch. Run!
Delta is no joke. Don't be late, they will leave your ass. #earlybirdcatchestheflight
— Official Wanda Sykes (@iamwandasykes) June 7, 2013
Age is nothing but a number, right?
I just "that's what she said" an 8 year old… I've reached a new low.
— Brooklyn Decker (@BrooklynDecker) July 31, 2013
Who needs a PR agent?
please hold while we get our shit together.
— joe jonas (@joejonas) October 22, 2013
“What to do when Beyoncé drops a new album” was not in the parenting manual:
I need guidance: do I wake my kid up to tell her about Beyoncé? It seems super important and in the future she will appreciate it right?
— Leslie Grossman (@MissLeslieG) December 13, 2013